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If You Don't Change, Change Will Find You Anyway

November 13th, 2018 at 05:32 am

I got an email today that was a response to a blog post I made 7 years ago. I had totally forgotten I had started this blog 12 years ago, and had last posted 7 years ago.

The saddest thing is that I have not changed any of my personal savings/spending habits, but, of course, life has happened anyway and I'm facing even more dire circumstances than when I last posted.

My wife finally moved out to her own place in 2013. I never sold the house we raised our kids in. All three kids have moved out. My wife and I never got divorced.

But ....

In April of 2018 I lost my job, caught up in a division wide layoff. And I haven't been able to find a new job since. I got severance, but that runs out in a week or two. I qualified for unemployment insurance, which I got for the maximum 26 weeks, but now that has run out.

My wife and I have health insurance via COBRA for another year, but the premium for COBRA is 4 times what I paid for insurance when employed.

I have about two months worth of expenses in savings, and then my next recourse is my 401(k). But, my wife and I are finally moving forward with the divorce, where we will split my 401(k), which is really meager, considering I worked at the same place for 20 years.

I have changed little in my approach to money since I started this blog in 2006, and I'm reaping the "benefits" of my bad habits.

But maybe I'll post a little more .... at least until I get distracted again.

3 Responses to “If You Don't Change, Change Will Find You Anyway”

  1. Wife of the Deacon Says:


    I am sorry to hear of the situation that you are in. I hope that you are able to adjust the sails and reset your course. I would suggest that you look into contract work if you already haven't. We know several people in their 50s who've been made redundant and this is what they've been able to land. I'm not sure of your industry or the market.

    Are you able to take in room mates to help defray the cost of the mortgage?
    Is your wife employed and able to get coverage for herself? That would be cheaper for you (or maybe she is paying her half, IDK).

    Other than that, all I can say is that I wish you well in making the changes that you need. I guess that sometimes you have to hit the bottom of the barrel in order to go up! We've been at the bottom a few times and only now things are improving (and our kids are 14/16/19/20). We've sacrified financially for parochial school tuition. In some ways, wish we hadn't but at least we're able to play catch up now. We're house poor and downsizing. Can't really frett looking back, but I wish we'd done thing differently, too.

  2. mumof2 Says:

    I tthink a lot of people look back and think if we had only done this sooner we would be better off...I know I do if I knew what I know now about budgeting and money now way back when we would be much better off but we deal with what we are dealt.

    The thing here is you still have some money to live on for a couple of months so now its time to look at your options, if you are paying off the morg then sell the house and use that money to get rid of debt or get a smaller place, or get room mates to help offset costs and help you out, write up a budget and start looking at ways and deals that will allow you to save on everything from utilities, phones, internet, insurances etc. Start looking for a job that does anything, any job is better than no job or maybe you can start a little business from depending on what you use to do for a job etc....you have a little time so time to get serious...or keep reaping these unfortunate rewards...good luck

  3. rob62521 Says:

    Sorry for the turn of events, but hopefully you can figure out some ways to save some money and find employment.

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